Angry Gorilla With The Bouncy Ball |
| Articles - Diabetes Articles | |||
| Monday, 06 December 2010 07:59 | |||
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"MMMooooMMM, I Feel LLLooowww!" (in the increasing in octaves...then decreasing in octaves "I am low" voice that I know all to well) came echoing down the stairway at 4:17 this morning.
I was up. I was making coffee. I ran up stairs to check on Joe, already knowing that he was indeed low. He was 51 at 4:12am. I had given him 3 glucose tablets while he slept. I had entered his room over three and a half hours after I was supposed to check him. You see, I should have checked Joe's blood glucose at 12:30am because Dave had given a correction dose of insulin at 9:30pm for a 266. When I went in to check him (three and a half hours late)... As I loaded the test strip into the meter, I was relieved to hear the soft nasally snore, knowing he was ... ... ... O.K (a nice word for "not dead"). 5-4-3-2-1... 51. He was O.K. But damn, I wanted to kick myself. I have a new phone. This Droid thing-y. My husband got it for me a couple of weeks ago. He was thinking I would enjoy "moderating" my blog on the go. Internet while shopping, Internet while driving, Internet while jogging, Internet while on ladders hanging Christmas lights, Internet access all the time is not a good thing. I actually don't use it much during these times. And, I have almost wrecked my car while moderating the blog while driving. I guess the long and the short of it is that I have a new phone, a complicated phone. I have always used my phone as my alarm. EVERY.NIGHT. I set it to wake me up according to Joe's blood sugar check needs. So, I have a phone that I am having a difficult time answering due to some fancy touch screen/slide maneuver that I must complete with my finger to pick-up the call. So, I have a phone that has remained silent when it is supposed to be waking my ass up. Frustration. So I can surf the web using my phone, but I cannot use the phone effectively for phone calls and alarms (the two functions I actually need the phone for). When I woke on my own at the said 4:12am, I knew Joe's number would most likely be low. He has been needing a few correction doses of insulin over the previous couple of days and with each dose he would go low within a couple of hours following. Basically his blood glucose numbers have looked like a bouncy ball pattern after it has been flung by an angry gorilla in an evacuated high school gym. High...Low...High... Low... High ....Low ....High ....Low ....High ....Low And...a little "therapeutic letter" for good measure: The "bitch-switch" is ON... Dear Angry, Oh So Angry, Seething Gorilla with the bouncy ball in the evacuated gym, Can you please stop flinging that ball/blood sugar around like you do your poo? I am tired of post hockey game adrenaline-induced highs. The correction-induced lows, especially the 36 that we endured last night can suck it..."it" being a juice box or a cannister of Glucose Tabs. Then there are the rebound highs...you know, like when your bouncy ball is hitting the gym ceiling rafters? Well...those are like Joe's 300's post-low highs. If that makes any sense what-so-ever. My confidence is shaken. My knowledge base is left in question. However, my will power will not be wavered...even by you Mr. Angry Bouncy Ball Flingin' Gorilla! Signed, Reyna (Joe's inefficient, ball-busting pancreas) Hopefully, after some thoughtful tweaking, a wing, and a prayer, and some good astrological alignment, I can get these blood sugars whipped back into shape. Perhaps I could get them to resemble a boulder nudged up hill by a sedated tortoise, with a broken leg or two. I dunno. Wish me luck. A day-in-the-life of ridiculous analogies... oh and tweaking. P.S. You'd be proud of me guys...I actually removed an F-Bomb from this post! Although, I did say the word "bitch". Not sure if that is much better.
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